so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i just found this napkin with your number on it in my jacket pocket. it reads amy, drawing of a wine bottle and a house
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
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