I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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