KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
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