Someone shit on the floor
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
