She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
Randomize
