i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
Randomize
