i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
He better not be in your backpack
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize