NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
