i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Did I show you my penis last night?
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
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