do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
