Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
Randomize
