can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
1. Are there men involved 2. Is there food involved 3. Do I have to put pants on 4. Do I have to leave this bed
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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