Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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