Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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