I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Randomize
