I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
When did I go from having sugar daddies to being one? And does it count as a tax write off?
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
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