i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
