worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
That's why we don't trade sex for Taco Bell. It's called the dollar menu.
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
Randomize
