...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
You took your pants and underwear off as soon as we got to Melissa's and just walked around the entire time like it was completely normal. We even ate pizza together with your vagina exposed. You're my hero.
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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