google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm both gender and math confused
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I was trying to type "I just want you naked" and it put "I just want you baked"
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
