..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
I just heard a girl in all seriousness say, "I told him I'm not a stalker. I just really really want to talk to him."
is wine microwaveable?
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
Randomize
