More tranny stories later!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
I'm having to shit out rocks
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
