Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
Even my vagina gasped.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Randomize
