You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I'm lying on the floor in the back room praying my boss doesn't come to work today.never again
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Apparently I told the mayor I want to be a trophy wife
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