I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
I'm drinking and throwing an enormous tennis ball at children. I couldn't be happier.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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