If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I just tipped a bartender in xanax.
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Chances are I'll be there for your wedding. Camelbaks filled with jack and coke are appropriate attire, right?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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