Your tits are I can't wait for
He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
