I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
For my job application I just put "community gardener- personal business" for my previous work experience in place of the neighborhood pot grower/distributor
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Your shirt... Was in my pants
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
