everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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