i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
You thought you were drunk? I woke up at 6 o'clock this morning with a cheeseburger in my left hand a drink in my right with my window half way down. it was raining.... fml
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I was so drunk I got stuck in the middle of a revolving door
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
Randomize
