Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
Randomize
