Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I don't want the last thing I hear while alive to be Jesse's Girl
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
I was gonna drive but when i tried to use telekinesis to get my keys, I knew I shouldn't be driving
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize
