its not stalking. its research.
woke up rolled in a yoga mat listening to enya. I'm never going back to Oregon ever again.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
I smoked that joint really fast and now I'm so high I'm crawling around on all 4 giving my dogs piggie back rides pretending its the macy day parade for dogs and I'm their giant human float.
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
