yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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