I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Disclaimer- Don’t worry about my wounded nip. I put a bandaid on it.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
