In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Woke up with a padlock locked onto my ear gauge and the first of many sticky note clues on my chest leading to the key.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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