I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
He passed out mid-signature
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Yo making cake in the shape of a penis is no easy feat
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
