My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Randomize
