you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
Randomize
