your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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