I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
