Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
He asked me to touch his mustache. Should I go home with him?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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