She's JV to your varsity
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Randomize
