I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Randomize
