But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
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