i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
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