Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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