Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
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