I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
Randomize
