Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize