We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Never underestimate the power of titties
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize