Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
Count me out. I seem to have semen induced blindness in one eye.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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